Five Ways to Heal A Broken Heart

This article gives practical steps to cooperating with God as He heals your broken heart.

The things that break our hearts cut deep and sometimes we may feel that life will never be the same again. I would never want to trivialize the pain you're experiencing with easy steps to numb the pain. However, I do want to empower you in the midst of the pain. I can do this because I know what it means to have a broken heart. After losing my mother as a young woman and going through a painful divorce, I know that what I am telling you in this article is true. You do not have to let this time of pain devastate and destroy you. Maybe your life will never be the same again, but that doesn't mean it can't be good again.

Life will always have it's ups and downs, wins and losses. Learning how to grow through the down times and losses is imperative to our spiritual and emotional health. Ultimately, God is the one who heals our hearts, but there are things you can do to cooperate with the healing God longs to bring you.
​
1. Hang onto Hope
Whenever we face crisis and heartbreak the first thing we lose is perspective. Pain is like a narrow canyon with twists and turns. The walls close in around you and you can't see the way forward or out. It is important that you not let yourself be convinced there is no way out or that the canyon will go on like this forever. Don't lose your hope that you will make it through and that God will bring you into a beautiful spacious place once again. There is always hope because God is always good. If we trust Him, He can use the things that have brought us the most pain to bring something beautiful into our lives.

2. Pray Authentic Prayers
It can be hard to pray when our emotions are overwhelming us. It is normal to ask why God is allowing something to painful to happen. Expressing our emotions, even anger, and asking the hard questions are an important part of prayer. Even people in the Bible prayed like this. Many of the Psalms are authentic prayers asking God why. God can handle whatever emotions you are feeling and questions you have. It's not about praying the right words but about being honest with God who already knows you inside out anyway. 

3. Rest
Everyone needs a little distraction from the hard things that life throws our way. While we don't want to check out completely (eventually we have to deal with the hard things) it is ok to take some time to regroup, rest, and do something that takes your mind off the painful circumstances. You will be able to think clearer and find strength to face the pain after you take the time you need to rest.

4. Ask for Help
Do you find it hard to ask for help because you're afraid of appearing weak or being rejected? You're not alone. Many of us struggle with asking for help when we need it the most. Consider changing the way you think about asking for help. First, asking for help isn't a sign of weakness but of strength. It takes strength to swallow your pride and admit you need someone else. Secondly, you could actually be helping someone by asking for their help. Many people want to be able to make a difference in the world and helping each other is the primary way we can do that. Wouldn't you be willing to help if someone asked you?

5. Find someone else to help.
There is something about choosing to help others, even when you're going through something painful yourself, that helps to heal your own brokenness. Maybe it helps us appreciate what blessings we still have or maybe it just helps get our minds off our own pain. It says in the Bible to "do for others what you would have them do for you" (Matthew 7:12, NIV). Some call this the golden rule because by following it you are actually doing everything the Lord would ask of you. Your obedience to the Lord in this way, even when it is the most difficult, will lead to opportunities for you to be blessed because of how you have given to others.

Article by Pastor Shawna Carpenter, 2/1/2020